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5 Things that Every Parent should Give their Children

By Maggie Dulcio, LMHC, CAP

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According to the Oxford dictionary, parenthood is defined as the state of being a parent and the responsibilities involved. Parents most often are responsible for the well-being, care and education of their minor children.  Remarkably, the period we spend in raising our children is so brief however, the impact we make is substantial.  The number of sleepless nights may be too many to count.  The angry outbursts of the tween years could leave wounds that may take some time to heal.  The moodiness of the adolescent years may have your head whirling like a pinwheel.  However, the cuddles, the hugs and kisses and the joy of witnessing the success of your children are unmatched. Parenthood is one of the most challenging aspect of life while being the most rewarding once we see the fruits of our labor.

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This past week, I attended the funeral of a ten year-old little girl.  She was her parents’ only child.  I cannot began to imagine the pain my friends are going through losing their only child at such a young age.  Saying goodbye to our loved ones is never easy no matter the age.  Sometimes after a person had lived a long life we can find peace in knowing that the person lived a fulfilling life. However, it’s the loses that take us by surprise and/or the lives that were taken too soon that can truly devastate us.  This situation really had me thinking about the brevity of life and what our roles are as parents and the impact we make in our children’s life.

As parents, there are five (5) things we should give our children.

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Love

Children need to know that they are loved and that even when they have failed or come short of the expectations, their parents love them.  You want to tell your children you love them every day.  Give them lots of hugs and kisses.  The adolescent years can be tough, some adolescents can be less affectionate than when they were younger, but you don’t want that to deter you from expressing love to your children.  Some children are very loving while others maybe …not so much.  Nonetheless, they still need to feel the love of their parents. Your children also need you to spend time with them, they need to know you are enough about them that you set time aside to be with them.

Safety

Children need to feel safe and need to have some consistency in their life.  This include having clear and consistent rules.  In my parenting class for divorcing parents, I often tell parents they don’t want to be the “in-and-out” parent.  Children need to know that their parents care for them and will be involved in their life.  Children need to have a stable home and parents who reinforce stability in their life.  They also need comfort when they are scared so show them you’ve taken steps to keep them safe.

Freedom to be themselves

It’s important that you listen to your children and find out about their interests.  Praise their efforts  and limit the criticisms.  Let them be who they were created to become.  Parents need to provide a supportive and loving atmosphere.  It’s important for children to make some decisions by themselves.  Let them make their own mistakes and not be too quick to rescue.

Hope and help them dream big

Help children gain a sense of empowerment and faith that things will work out.  Allow them the opportunity to achieve success and to learn from trial and error.  As parents, you want to help boost your children’s self-esteem.  Parent’s words and actions carry a lot of weight in the child’s self-esteem development.  Praising your children and letting them do things independently will help then feel strong and competent.

Direction

Children need guidance; discipline is necessary in every household. The goal of discipline is to help kids choose acceptable behaviors and learn self-control. It’s important to set rules and guidelines that help children develop and grow.  Children need a sense of order.  They need boundaries and limitations and as a parent, you want to encourage responsibility.  Lastly, children need parents who will teach them what is right and wrong.  It’s as important that parents be a good role model.

 

Anxiety and your Health

By Maggie Dulcio, LMHC, CAP

Anxiety can be very debilitating to those who suffers from it.  It can be described as exaggerated worries and expectations of negative outcomes in unknown situations.  Anxiety can cause sufferers to dread everyday situations.  It can manifest in many different ways such as General Anxiety, Phobias, Social Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Separation Anxiety.  In many instances, anxiety co-occurs with Depression.  Often times, anxiety will keep people from sleeping, concentrating, talking to others or even leaving their home. Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S. About 18% of the American population is currently suffering from an Anxiety Disorder.

Anxiety symptoms may vary but common symptoms are muscle tension, headaches, stomach cramps, frequent urination, obsessive thoughts, sweating, heart palpitations, nausea, fatigue, dizziness, trembling or shaking and ritualistic behaviors.  Causes can vary from one individual to another.  There’s rarely one concrete cause of an anxiety disorder.  Contributing factors include brain chemistry, genetics, environmental conditions, upbringing and life events.  Other factors which may increase the risk of developing an Anxiety Disorder are long-lasting stress, chemical imbalance, family history and other mental health issues, trauma, and a history of abuse.

Anxiety disorders are treatable.  Medications alone have proven to not be effective in treating Anxiety.  There can be many side affects associated with anti-anxiety medications.  Often times, tranquilizers are usually prescribed for people suffering from Anxiety. Common medications for treating anxiety are Xanax, Klonopin, Valium and Ativan.  Options for treatment include Cognitive behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), group therapy and of course, medication.  There are alternative treatment as well such as Mindfulness, Meditation, Acupuncture, Yoga and Aromatherapy.  People my choose alternative treatment due to side effects associated with the use of medication.  Some common side affects are drowsiness, slowed reflexes, slurred speech, confusion and disorientation, Depression, impaired thinking and judgment, memory loss, nausea and blurred or double vision.

Ameo picmonk         anxiety essantial oils

Many studies have shown that some essential oils are helpful in decreasing anxiety symptoms. Essential oils can be inhaled or applied topically. There are also some oils which may be safe for ingestion.  Be sure to read labels carefully prior to ingesting any oil.  Oils should be pure and not diluted or blended with synthetics that are unsafe for ingesting.  I’m a distributor for Zija International, they manufacture a line of essential oils and the oils are pure and pharmaceutical grade.  These are top oils on the market.  For additional information visit: https://dulciomagdala.myzija.com/zija_nation/zn_ameo.html?country=us&language=EN

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10 Reasons to Practice

Mindfulness

By Maggie Dulcio, LMHC, CAP

Mindfulness is a state of active open attention on the present.  Thoughts and feelings are observed from a distance without judging them as good or bad.

Here are 10 reasons to practice Mindfulness:

  1. Mindfulness is good for our bodies—According to a seminal study published by the National Institute of Health in 2003, after eight (8) weeks of training and practicing mindfulness meditation, it boost the immune system’s ability to fight off illness.
  2. Mindfulness is good for our minds—Several studies have indicated that mindfulness increases positive emotions and reduces negative emotions.  Mindfulness may be a good anti-depressant to fight depression.
  3. Mindfulness helps us focus—The practice of Mindfulness helps tune out distractions and improves memory and attention skills.
  4. Mindfulness helps improve relationships—Research suggests mindful training makes couples more satisfied with their relationship.  It also makes each partner feel more optimistic, relaxed and makes the couples feel more accepting and closer to each other.
  5. Mindfulness is helpful for parents-to-be—Studies have suggested that it may reduce pregnancy related anxiety, stress and depression in expectant parents.
  6. Mindfulness helps parents—It has been shown that parents who practice mindfulness report being happier with their parenting skills and relationship with their children.  In addition, their children were found to have better social skills.
  7. Mindfulness helps schools—There is scientific evidence that teaching mindfulness in the classroom reduces behavior problems and aggressiveness among students.  It improves their happiness levels and ability to pay attention.
  8. Mindfulness is helpful to healthcare professionals—It helps them cope with stress, connect with their patients and improve their general quality of life.
  9. Mindfulness helps veterans—Studies suggest it can reduce the symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
  10. Mindfulness fights obesity—Practicing “mindful eating” encourages healthier eating habits, helps people lose weight, and help them savor the food that they eat.

Another great weight management system is through Zija.  They utilize the power of the Moringa plant to develop a weight management program.  I’m a distributor and a customer, I have nothing but good things to say about the products.  For additional information visit: https://dulciomagdala.myzija.com.

The Cost of Care

By Maggie Dulcio, LMHC, CAP

I recently heard Dee Hutchins, a former basketball coach and retired teacher, speak on what we need to do to take good care of ourselves.  He is a health expert and has had the opportunity to rub elbows with many renowned individuals in the sports world.  He has worked with and trained several athletes.  He truly believes that the body is our temple and we need to do whatever necessary to maintain it.  Dee made it very simple, he said if we wanted to take good care of ourselves we needed to do these four simple things: have a good night sleep, drink plenty of water, be active and eat well.

Sleep is essential for a person’s health and wellbeing.  According to the American Psychological Association (APA) 60% of adults report having sleep problems a few nights during the week.  Additionally, 69% of children experience one or more sleep problems a few nights a week.  Although individual sleep needs vary, most adults need between six to eight (6-8) hours of sleep per night.  Benefits of a good night sleep include: improved mood, better health, better weight control, better memory and better focus.  Many studies have been conducted and results are the same, sleep deprivation affects mental and physical wellness.                                                                                                                         

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Another important key to wellness is ensuring we drink plenty of water daily.  The human body is made up of 65% water.  Unfortunately, many of us are not drinking enough water.  Water helps keep our temperature regulated, lubricate and cushion joints and get rid of wastes through urination, perspiration and bowel movements.

                                                                                        water picmonk

If we want to be healthy, we need to be active.  Exercise is one of the most important activity for your health. Physical activity can help combat many health conditions and diseases.  It can reduce the risk of heart disease and Type II Diabetes and Metabolic Syndrome.  Being active can also reduce the risk of some cancers and control one’s weight.  Studies have shown that exercise can improve Mental Health and improve mood.  It also will boost energy and promote better sleep.

Lastly, a balanced diet is vital for good health and well-being.  Food provides our bodies with energy, protein, essential fats, vitamins and minerals to grow and function properly.  Daily food choices make a big difference in our health.  Good nutrition can help reduce risk of some diseases, including heart disease, diabetes, strokes, some cancer and osteoporosis.  Good nutrition will improve the ability to recover from illness and injury and increase energy level.  Nutritious meals mean your body gets all the nutrients, vitamins and minerals it need to work its best.  Our body needs plenty of fruits and vegetables daily.  We need to eat plenty of whole grains and should drink low-fat or fat-free milk.  It is also recommended that we eat lean meats or replace meats and poultry with fish, beans or tofu.

It is estimated that two-thirds of American adults are overweight or obese.  Additionally, the US Department of Agriculture, reports a healthier diet could prevent at least $71 billion per year in medical costs and lost lives.  75% of healthcare dollars are spent on treating preventable diseases.  Dee Hutchins said something that resonated with me.  He said sleep, water, exercise are essentially free!  Basically, three out of the four important thinks we need to do to take good care of ourselves is free.  It only require some efforts on our part.  We know that the cost of proper nutrition is a challenge that many faces.  Buying fruits and vegetables and healthy meals can get a bit expensive.  Although eating proper nutritious meals may be more costly than eating food lacking nutritious value, ultimately we end up saving more due to the healthcare cost savings from preventing diseases such as diabetes, hypertension and cardiovascular disease to name a few.  Another challenge that we face is that due to harsh processing and manufacturing of food, there’s a dietary void and food vital nutrients are damaged through the course of production or harvest.  Sadly, we might be spending the money but just not getting the needed nutrients from our food because it’s simply not there.

I’m a distributor for a great natural health company and the core ingredient for their products is the Moringa Oleifera plant.  moringa infographic

They have a nutritional product, the SuperMix which contain all nine essential amino acids, plus nine additional amino acids.  The supplement contains vital proteins, omega oils, all the required vitamins and minerals our body needs. By consuming this nutrition regularly, it can help control food cravings and allow us to feel more sustained.  Some of the health benefits of this nutrition include nourishing the body’s immune system, promoting healthy digestion, helping maintain healthy blood sugar levels, increasing energy, heightening mental clarity, promoting healthy circulation and delivering anti-inflammatory support.

For additional information visit:

https://dulciomagdala.myzija.com/zija_nation/zn_core_moringa.html?country=us&language=EN

 

What’s all the Rave about Essential Oils?

By Maggie Dulcio, LMHC, CAP

Did you know that often times we can look to nature to find help for our physical and mental ailments.  Our creator did an amazing job in ensuring that nature had all that the body needs to be completely well.  For hundreds of years our ancestors look to nature to treat many illnesses.  They used plants and herbs to treat digestive problems, fever, headaches and many more. 

Essential oils have been used medicinally throughout history.  Over the years with evolution of men and the advancements in modern medicine some have forgotten or failed to understand the power found in plants and in nature.  Nonetheless, in recent years, interest in essential oils has been revived with the growing popularity of aromatherapy.  Essential oils derived from plants.  It is the distilled liquid, most frequently by steam or water from the leaves, stems, flowers, bark, roots or other elements of a plant.  One may think, when you hear the term “Essential Oil” that the liquid is “oily”.  On the contrary, essential oils are not oily.  They contain the true essence of the plant from which they are derived.  Essential oils are concentrated so a little goes a long way.  Keep in mind that essential oils are not the same as perfume oils or fragrance oils.  Perfume oils are artificially created fragrances or contain artificial substances and do not offer the therapeutic benefits of essential oils.

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The composition and aroma of essential oils can provide valuable psychological and physical therapeutic benefits.  Essential oils enter the body primarily in three ways: applied to the skin, inhaled, or ingested.  There are more than 90 types of essential oils, each with its unique smell and potential health benefits. 

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It is very important to consider the following when choosing your essential oils:

Purity:             Find an oil that contains only aromatic plant compounds without additives or synthetic oils.  Pure oils usually list the plant’s botanical name rather than terms like “essential oil of…”.

Quality:          Choose a chemical free essential oil that has been extracted through distillation or mechanical cold pressing.

Reputation: Purchase from a brand with a reputation for producing high-quality products.

I get my essential oils from a very reputable company and the oils are pharmaceutical grade.  I am a customer and a distributor.  My therapy clients truly enjoy these oils. For more information, visit:

https://dulciomagdala.myzija.com/zija_nation/zn_ameo.html?country=us&language=EN

Depression is Real

 

 

 

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By Maggie Dulcio, LMHC, CAP

Do you know anyone who suffers from Depression?  Chances are you do and you may not even be aware of it.  It is estimated that 80% of individuals affected by depression do not receive treatment.  Two (2) out of three (3) people suffering with depression do not actively seek nor receive proper treatment.  Depression is the leading cause of disability in the U.S. for ages 11- 44.  It affects more that 15 million American adults.  As many as one (1) in 33 children and one (1) in eight (8) adolescents have clinical depression.  Depression affects how you feel, think and handle daily activities.  Symptoms include:

  • Persistent sadness, anxious mood or feeling an “empty” mood
  • Feelings of hopelessness or pessimism
  • Irritability
  • Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities
  • Decreased energy or fatigue
  • Moving or talking more slowly
  • Difficulty concentrating, remembering or making decisions
  • Sleep disturbance
  • Appetite/weight changes
  • Aches or pains, digestive problems without clear physical cause
  • Thoughts of death or suicide; suicide attempts

Despite the prevalence of depression in our society, there are some common myths that need to be addressed.

Myth

Depression is not a real illness, you can simply “snap out of it”.

Truth

Depression is not mere sadness or even a weakness of character.  It has social, psychological and biological origins. Depression is a medical condition in which your brain chemistry, function, and structure are negatively affected.

Myth

Depression only happens when something bad happens in your life.

Truth

Depression is more than just having occasional feelings of sadness when things don’t go well for you.  Depression can come on suddenly, even when things in your life may appear to be going well.

Myth

Depression only affects women

Truth

It is true that women more often report symptoms of depression.  However, in our society there are pressure on men to not discuss their feelings.  Depression can affect men as well as women. Additionally, men are more likely to commit suicide than women.

Myth

Anti depressant always cure depression.

Truth

Depression is treatable.  Your doctor may prescribe may prescribe anti depressant medications.  These drugs alter the brain chemistry however, these medication often aren’t enough alone.  Combining medications with talk therapy is a common treatment strategy.

moringa downloadThere is no one proven way to help people recover from depression.  It is different for everyone.  Common treatment include medication, talk therapy and alternative and complementary treatment.  I have personal experience dealing with depression and I have seen positive results from using Moringa Oleifera.  The Moringa is the most nutritious plant and has many medicinal uses.  Depression caused by nutritional deficiencies will general improve with a daily consumption of Moringa Oleifera leaf powder.  Additionally, as a high protein food and a rich source of the amino acid tryptophan benefiting neurotransmitter functions including those that produce serotonin.  Moringa is al rich in antioxidants that improve thyroid health which help maintain high energy levels and fighting fatigue. It has been documented by more then 1,300 studies, articles and reports that Moringa Oleifera has many healing abilities.  Moringa is also known to boost energy levels and improve mood and mental clarity.  Moringa Oleifera was named the plant of the year by the National Institute of Health in 2008. It was also featured in Dr. Oz.’s talk show and many companies are now harvesting and manufacturing several products with the Moringa plant.  If you are under the care of a doctor, please consult with your healthcare professional prior to using the plant.

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For additional information, please visit: https://dulciomagdala.myzija.com/zija_nation/zn_core_moringa.html?country=us&language=EN

About Oasis Counseling

Oasis Counseling- The mission of Oasis Counseling is to enrich and empower the individuals and families that we serve and to inspire people to make positive decisions which will help them become productive citizens. We work with individuals struggling with depression, anxiety, PTSD and more. We also deal with domestic violence, substance abuse and anger issues. We help people manage their life and help guide them to make better life choices.

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